The Sunshine Factor

where sunshine is a way of life


Editorial: I Don’t Believe It


Grief (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Today I’d like to address the issue of grief and the common misperceptions about it.

I ran into a friend the other day who was grieving the loss of her dog.  I expressed my condolescences, being an animal lover myself.  “No, no,” she assured me, “I am doing just fine.   I’m in a new season of my life now, and I really like it.”   That might have been believable, had she not been overly exuberant about her new exercise routine and all the changes she was making in her life – almost like she was trying to talk herself into being “okay” about her loss.

Some people claim that God does not want us to be sad or get depressed.  This is what I don’t believe.  God gave us various emotions for a reason, so we could feel all the highs and lows that life dishes out.  Even Jesus wept and grieved.  I don’t believe we are to always be happy.  Nice goal, but totally inaccurate.

What I do believe is that we live in the real world.  Sometimes it is great and we are able to grab the brass ring.  Other times, it is human to have feelings on the negative side.  It is okay to be human.  It is not okay to always put on a brave front.   It is not okay to deny yourself feelings.  Besides, it is how you act on those feelings, and not the feelings themselves, that is important.

September is National Mental Health Month.   Speaking of that, I’d like to quickly address the subject of depression.  There is a type of depression that has nothing to do with what’s going on in your life (situational).   Some depression is caused by imbalances in the brain.   That kind of depression (major depression) and other mental illnesses cannot simply be swept under the rug or denied — much like I could not wish away the cancer that my body came down with four years ago.

Just to recap my opinion about grief…to get over a loss, walk right through it.  Sure, it’s going to hurt.  But living in denial of your feelings can have negative consequences in your future, too.


Debb Stanton

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Book Review on Author Collette A. Henry

Hello friends,

Yesterday I read Get Outta My Head:  My Journey Living With Brain Cancer by Collette A. Henry.  Collette has a great blog here on WordPress, and I would like to share with you the review I wrote about her book on

I am so glad to have been given the opportunity to read Collette’s book.  Like her friend Allen O. Green states, she does have a winning smile, and this book shows me that she has a winning life!  Her attitude, passion for helping others, and engaging way of talking with her readers, make this a very inspiring book.  In fact, I am a breast cancer survivor, and I learned more cancer facts through Collette.   She is helpful to all people, in my opinion, sharing exactly what cancer is and how you can do healthy things for yourself to hopefully keep cancer away.  Collette has a very great story that needs to be read.

I was hoping for a cancer experience book that could make you feel comfortable with the author.  I was not disappointed.  If I could, I would give Collette and her book a standing ovation.  🙂

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Sunday Snowstorm in MN/Vitamin D

Yesterday we got snow, then sleet, then rain all afternoon.  The Minnesota Twins’ baseball game even got canceled at Target Field.

Today it’s still cloudy and just above freezing.

In cloudy winter and spring days like this, I’ve heard it said that taking Vitamin D helps prevent depression – it acts like the sun.  🙂


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Make Believe: Debb’s Arsenal


I’ve created a bizarre story.  Maybe it will help me as I rail against momentary depression.

If I “humanize” depression, I will be able to write it out.  (If you want, you could insert any terrible thing into my story…)  Here goes…

“Debb’s Revenge”

Depression, you have angered me

and saddened me

too often.  I’m calling war on you.

I have a whole list of wished-for punishments for you

in my arsenal;

I can’t wait to use them.

But first,

Let me go over with you

just what has made you such a hideous presence.

When you visit me

I’m never warned ahead of time.

You pop up wherever, whenever,

with absolutely no reasoning behind your visits.

Take a look in the mirror.

See your matted hair?

Your clothes and my nose tell me

that you have rolled in the weeds into

dog urine, poop and vomit.

Your eyes are dull

and of course, you don’t smile.

You must be aware

of all your broken, sharp teeth

and the dental work you need to have done.

The closer you come to people,

the more you envelop their world.

It is hard for people to be our natural selves

when an evil, two-faced dragon

is lying in wait, ready to pounce

and kill

and destroy.

So here is my arsenal, Buster.

I want you hung out to dry

(if someone can stand to smell your killing odor and get close enough to hang you).

Next stop, after you actually can breathe again,

I will torch you with fire – just up to the point of death.

Then, I will have an untrained surgeon

cut the tongue out of your mouth without anesthetic.

This is so you can’t tell lies anymore.

I will arrange to have itching powder poured all over you

so that you will need to scratch your pus-covered, phosphate-infested skin.

But alas, you will find that your fingernails have been

replaced by 10-inch long, rusty nails.

You start bleeding…

and then I come up with the final blow.

I pour black paint over your head,

with a long stick I scrunch it together.

I spray hair spray all over your head, hair, face and

into your eyes.

Then, a huge piece of smelly headcheese

laced with lead

(that you can’t handle very well

because of your very short tongue) arrives

in a package

on the back of a horse.

The horse decides

he’d better kick you while he can.

After his kick, I jam the headcheese into your mouth.

Oh yes, one more thing.

The horse nudges me to open the rest of the package.

I open the jar found therein and pour the honey

all over your sprayed-stiff, painted hair.

You attract armies of bees, hornets, and wasps that sting –

and birds that pluck out your eyes.

You die from loss of blood

caused from you scratching yourself with nails –

and from the anaphyllactic stings courtesy the winged armies.

Goodbye!  Good riddance!  We hate you!

Welcome back, Sunshine and Joy!